Below Deck Sailing Yacht: My Nausea Is Not Because of the Keeling

Welcome back, sailors! I’m glad to not be the only one giving this yacht a shot, but I definitely am not full blown into Sailing just yet. The one month old isn’t the only crying baby this episode, so let’s get to it.

My life preserver Madison is working her tail off with service, and turn downs, and beach trips…oh my. Having Jenna as a chief might be the only thing that keeps our little Energizer bunny from going and going. While Jenna appears to be doing the workload of a pair of AAA’s, Madison is a straight up car battery keeping the interior going. She didn’t even crash until 4:30 AM. I hope she remembers that even she needs to recharge.

The next morning Georgia gives her a little grief for not finishing the laundry, and while I’ve enjoyed Georgia up to this point…lay off my girl. She’s running circles around you and is saving her flirting for when she’s off the clock, and it’s not with a guy who’s already taken.

Parker is schooling us on how complicated slipcovers can be. I get that we need a little color commentary, but let’s just say he hasn’t mastered that either. What he is good at is attempting to follow instructions…as long as you completely spell it out for him. That’s something Ciara is only good at doing if they come straight out of her boyfriend Paget’s mouth, and even then she’ll talk back.

She didn’t take kindly to Parker relaying Paget’s instructions that one of them needed to be on the deck at all times while he took his break. Ciara’s spidey senses are already tingling over Georgia’s flirtations and balks that anyone knows Paget’s mind better than she does.

The guests spent the day cliff diving and visiting one of the towns. The trip to town was delayed so Ciara could complain about Parker, and then put the slipcovers back on that she didn’t need to freshen up in the first place. Madison tries to learn from the previous night’s admonitions and starts turn downs early with Georgia. Unsurprisingly Jenna is unhappy with her choice, as it seems the only things that can make Jenna happy are Adam’s cheesy pick-up lines. Cut to Madison groaning in the confessional over their nauseating banter, and she is me and most viewers right now. Who knew that a boatmance could make you queasier than a ship keeling at 20 degrees?

Captain Glenn gets invited to dinner by the primary and it truly feels like we’re watching an awkward 2nd chances version of a later in life Dating Game. Talking over each other, rambling…all that was missing was him accidentally spilling something on her dress.

The next day the guests disembark and leave a great tip behind in their wake. $1550 a person sounds like even if the crew aren’t happy with each other, they’re able to make the guests happy.

That night they head out for drinks on their night off and Ciara is imitating the wet slipcovers. What a drag. She wants one on one time with Paget, who is perfectly content with drinking with the crew. When they all do head back, it’s actually Adam and Jenna that are hooking up and this is where I need to hop up for some Tums. Yeccch. I feel like I did when I was 8 and saw my parents kissing. Am I the only one wishing the sailboat had a glass bottom and I could alternatively be looking down the gullet of a plecostomus?

Next week should be a bang up time, literally, as Captain Glenn assesses the damage to the boat. (Do sailboats not use fenders?) Hope to see y’all then!

Full time housewife, mom, and grandma with more opinions than my family can handle, so I share them with the internet instead.

2 thoughts on “Below Deck Sailing Yacht: My Nausea Is Not Because of the Keeling”

    1. Totally agree, Glenda. Madison is the saving grace for me as well. I like Georgia, but am not hip on the Paget flirtation or her coming at Madison’s work ethic this week. Captain Glenn is no Captain Lee, but I’m enjoying him as well. Thanks for reading! XOXO

Leave a Reply