Another week with the Real Housewives of New Jersey has us strolling down memory lane and enjoying present day antics at a favorite teenage haunt. Join us on our journey through de-saturated clips of moments past and see how they intertwine with the here and now.
Prom preparations are in full swing as Teresa scurries madly around her McMansion trying to create the perfect setting to celebrate Gia. While T is known for making a big deal of moments, this one is especially important to her as she tries to make up for missing Gia’s 8th grade prom while she was incarcerated. (That’s what “away” means, so I’m going to use it.)
Mylar and helium abound, as do veggie trays and oddly phallic balloon arrangements placed at the entrance. Considering proms are notoriously recognized as virginity-stealers, I’m not sure Teresa thought through the subliminal message she was sending. Regardless, it beats an Amazon box with party trinkets inside. Yes, I’m still beating that horse. It’s not dead yet, in my opinion.
Through production flashbacks we’re reminded just how much Gia has grown since we first started watching. Whether despite or because of the difficulties she’s faced, she’s turned into a lovely young woman.
Across the Hudson Jennifer’s brother Steven is holding a fundraiser for The Long Island Musical Theater Festival. Broadway star Caroline Bowman performs along with some of the students. Jennifer’s mother, who has been hesitant to acknowledge her son’s sexuality, is brought to tears of pride. She assures Steven that no matter what, she’ll be there for him.
Flash to a sit down meet-up between Teresa and Danielle with a side of avocado toast. Yada, yada, yada. Danielle’s been iced out, so let’s move on.
Dolores and David discuss commitment in their partially finished home and the only commitment that’s settled upon is one for new furniture. Dolores has more faith than I do in David. He’s not accompanying her anywhere, not her friends’ events or even the trip she’s planned to the Jersey Shore. Fish or cut bait is my best recommendation for Ms. Catania.
Onto the main event, and considering there are more issues going on between these cast members than there are grains of sand on the Jersey Shore, I’m expecting fireworks of epic proportions. The house is lovely and likely a huge step up from where they laid their heads in their youth. Rooms allotted by cupcakes are a new twist. After they all deposit their luggage, they gather in the kitchen for pre-dinner drinks which consists of Patron, Grey Goose, and piping-hot Joe G tea.
I’m of two opposing minds when it comes to this spillage. The viewer in me loves that Teresa’s eyes are finally open. However, the mom in me is uncomfortable because, for the sake of my children, I would never discuss my ex’s indiscretions publicly. Joe is their father after all and for a time he was her partner.
Dinner is mostly uneventful barring Melissa trying to start something she can’t really finish with Jennifer. While I don’t condone tossing of flatware or dinnerware, Melissa started the argument by calling them all losers. She will never be the angel she pretends to be.
The show wraps up the following morning with Teresa regretting discussing Joe’s dalliances. Looks like she and I are on the same page after all. Marge tries to bond with her over lawsuits, and Jennifer points out that their situations aren’t the same, because Marge is going through it with her husband and Teresa is alone in her fight. Marge takes umbrage and digs at Jennifer by saying she didn’t know Jennifer had a job. Once again Marge winds up in my Fecal File, because as a former full-time mom…trust me, it’s work.
Hope to see you next week and until then don’t forget to check out the Kiki & Kibbitz bonus podcast for this week if you haven’t already. https://apple.co/3bwTyuo