Below Deck Sailing Yacht: Why Work When You Can Gripe and Flirt

Welcome back to the sniping and grousing of Ciara and Paget. Don’t be fooled into thinking it’s merely an attempt at continuity between episodes. It’s the tone of practically the entire show.

The guests are discussing which crew member they would pick to sleep with if they had to choose one. The consensus is Jenna, and I have to chuckle at how flattered she is by it. Apparently she missed the part where their reasoning was because she could bring them breakfast in bed the morning after.

Everyone turns in for the night and Adam is frustrated with Parker because he had set and alarm for anchor watch and he’s slamming doors. The next morning he chastises Parker, who is immediately apologetic. I’m sure it was inconvenient for Adam, but he’s not the only one with a job to do.

Captain Glenn wants to take advantage of the 14 knot winds and give the guests the sailing experience he was unable to provide them the previous day. Hoist the mizzen and the main and Good Golly Miss Molly the boat is rocking and rolling. Adam, who is unaccustomed to preparing breakfast on a teeter-totter, asks the Captain if they can drop sails for forty minutes to serve breakfast. He gets a hard “No,” from Glenn, and figures out how to make it work.

During breakfast the boat is tacking back to port, which we learn is basically a zigzag pattern. Cue the broken glasses and crew members using the keeling for a bit of fun sliding on the floor. Parker breaks some unspoken rule about not discussing vacuums with Jenna, and is reprimanded yet again. Fair to say, it’s not his day.

Despite some trouble docking the guests disembark safely, compliment Adam on working with all of the dietary restrictions, and leave a $13,500 tip which puts $1500 in each crew members pocket.

So far, aside from service and planning weddings that never happen, Jenna’s skill set seems to be flirting with Adam in the galley and griping about Madison and Georgia. Georgia is getting the brunt of it as Jenna dresses her down for the state of the laundry. All too ironic considering not only has she not given Georgia a system to follow, but Jenna also doesn’t know the difference between the washer and the dryer. Maybe if Adam was in the laundry room instead of the galley, she might get a clue.

The preference sheet meeting has them all flummoxed as they find out the next set of guests are bringing a one month old baby with them. Jenna thinks they’re crazy and that after having a baby, they should just chill. Not sure that she quite gets that there is little that’s more chill than being waited on hand and foot on a luxury sailing yacht. Her comments about not needing to be a rocket scientist to stew are on full display here. Adam is just relieved that there isn’t a single dietary restriction.

Jenna, having nothing better to do gives Georgia more grief because she’s not ironing Adam’s black chef coat, and it’s nowhere to be found. The thing is Adam isn’t stressed about it at all because he has others, but that doesn’t stop jerky Jenna from berating Georgia to the point of tears. Someone please get working on a Kate clone STAT, because I’m over this joyless joker.

As the guests board there’s just one teensy problem…those lack of dietary restrictions are thrown overboard and now include no eggs, dairy, nuts, soy, or coffee for the new mom. Adam is less than thrilled, but pulls a nice lunch out of his rear after extricating Jenna’s head from it first.

Prep is underway for a campfire on the beach and Paget and Ciara provide us with another round of relationship “don’ts.” Whether it’s editing or their normal dynamic, it certainly seems from my vantage point that Paget has more chemistry with Georgia than Ciara.

There is still no chemistry or love lost between Jenna and her stews. The organization she wants so desperately regarding laundry is seemingly another case of “Do as I say, not as I do.” She has Madison and Georgia running all over the boat because she’s failed to give them any prioritization instructions. The only thing I know is my priority by the end of this episode is to decide whether to jump ship or not.

Hopefully next week we’re back on course with more fun and less complaining on their parts and on mine. We’ll have to wait and see.

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